How to move on with your life after the death of loved one?

I recently became a widow and the pain of losing him effects my day to day life. If I could stay in bed for the rest of the year I wouldn't have a problem with it. Any advice at all would be greatly appreciated! I just want to be able to smile again.How to move on with your life after the death of loved one?
I am very sorry for your loss. I lost my wife almost 9 years ago and it was the hardest thing I ever went through. The hurt will eventually recede, but until it does do not rush into any big decisions. Take some time and let your pain heal. Learn to lean on God he will help you get through your hurt. At the time when she died I didn't see any good that could come out of what I was going through. Now looking back I learned a lot during this time. I learned to be more compassionate to others who are hurting and try to help them. Being able to understand the pain they are feeling has helped me to relate to others and help them cope with their suffering. Surround yourself with real good friends and stay occupied so you do not spend so much time thinking of your loss. If you do not have any friends that can relate to what you are going through feel free to email me and I would be happy to help in any way I can. Again I am so sorry for your loss but want to let you know that you will be able to smile again.





God BlessHow to move on with your life after the death of loved one?
Well I don't really know how long you and your spouse were married but it doesn't matter, it is still probably just as painful, no matter how long you two were married. I have not experienced what you are going through, but I will say that I have always prayed to God that I go first so that I wouldn't have to go through what you must be going through right now. All I can say is that only time will heal the wound. I know like you said that you would like to just lay down and sleep for a year, but life does go on my dear. You have got to pull yourself together, and realize that your husband would not want you to just want to give up on life. Try to think of all the good times that you both had together. Try to thank God for the time that you had with him, you could have lived your whole life and never had met him. This is life, and at times it is not fair I know, but trust me there will come a day when you will smile again. You will never forget him, but God would not have took him first if He didn't think that you could have handle it. Just take one day at a time, you will see that it will get better. I pray that it will not be too long before you will want to live again. If I can help you in anyway, let me know. God bless you
My grandfather who I was really close to just died and I cried everyday for a week. But the thing I did one night is open the bible randomly and just asked God to help me and guide me. Ive been fine ever since and now I can live with the fact that im going to see him again in heaven when christ returns. And you can experience the reward also of seeing your husband again someday soon if you give your life to christ.
I am sorry for your loss. As it has never happened to me I cannot know your pain but you are describing Depression. I know about that and the sooner you get it treated the better for you. Your loss has created a huge hole in your life I believe you need to find someone to love and be loved by to fill up that hole. I wish you the best.
I also lost my husband, 15 yrs ago, so I know a little about what you're going through. There are many stages of bereavement and you move back and forth through all of them, but it does get easier. I can promise you that. The best advice I can give is to stay busy, keep your mind occupied, a hobby, work, whatever it takes. Counseling works wonders. Also, remember that it's selfish on our part to want to keep our loved ones with us and don't forget the people in your life that are depending on you. I am sorry for your loss and I wish you the best.
Time is the great healer....words are not as effective...but, from experience I can tell you that Time heals all things. The problem with what I told you is that time must pass...which means there are no quick cures. When disaster came in my life, the death of a loved one, I tried to will myself dead by staying in bed and refusing to eat. My plan failed because of two things, I am a coward and I hate pain. But those two failings set me on the road of recovery and for the next twenty years I shared my loving heart to things and people, and in that way, the soul of of my loved one I lost gained a measure of immortality.....and I have been happy and not wasted my life walking in the valley of despair..........peace...........
I am so sorry for the lost of your husband and friend. I know the feeling. I lost my mother 6 months ago (we lived together and I cared for her). I found that you have to go through the grieving stages, it is only natural. Eventually, you will get to the acceptance stage, only then will you be able to smile again. God was with me when I felt alone and scared. When I was grieving, I felt like I was going to go mad. But then I had a dream about my mom and she was dressed in a white slacks and a yellow sleeveless top. She was young and healthy and when I looked up she gave me the biggest smile and I just ran to her and hugged her tightly. Then I knew she was okay. You will never get over your husband but you will be able to smile again. I hope you have someone to talk to. God was with me all the way. Keep busy, that will take your mind off things for awhile. (((hugs))))
I'm so sorry for your loss, I can't imagine losing my partner.. even the thought of it makes me want to cry, so I can't even imagine what you must be going through.





I think the only thing which can help you is to keep busy, if you are part of a church get involved in some of their projects or clubs. Invite your friends over to your place for tea or go to theirs etc. Just don't lock yourself out and separate yourself from the world, as much as I know you want to do it, it will only make getting over him more difficult.





Really hope you will find strength to deal with it all *hug*





Best wishes, Anya
Oh, I'm so sorry!





Your husband wouldn't want you to be sad! Remember, he is happy now. He is with God! Be around your family. When I lost someone i loved, it helped me to be around my family. We all supported one another. You will get through this! When I lost my Grandma, one of my friends gave me a card and on the back of it, it said this:





';I am home in Heaven dear ones


Oh so happy and so bright!


There is perfect joy and beauty


in this everlasting light.





All the pain and grief is over


every restless tossing passed


i am now at peace forever


safely home in heaven at last





Did you wonder i so calmly


trod the valley of shade?


Oh! but Jesus' love illumined


every dark and fearful glade.





and he came Himself to meet me


in that way so hard to tread


and with Jesus' arm to lean on


could i have one doubt or dread?





then you must not grieve so sorely


for i love you dearly still


try to look beyond earth's shadows


Pray to trust our Father's Will





There is work still waiting for you


so you must not idly stand


do it now while life remainth


you shall rest in Jesus' land.





when that work is all completed


he will gently call you Home


Oh, the rapture of that meeting


Oh, the joy to see you come!';





I hope this helps! Your husband is still with you, just as God is! Trust in God. He will help you through this. You will be in my prayers!





God bless you!
No one die. Its only the soul that leave the body. If u love the soul of ur loved ones, its still living. The only difference is that u cannot see it. If u truly loved, u could feel its presence any moment.





U may join ';Art of living'; workshop. I m sure u would be out of the pain on fifth day.
Speak to your GP about it, you may need antidepressants for a while, or a course of therapy. At the very least they should be able to put you in touch with a bereavement counsellor. Other than that.. well time heals, it's been 4 years since we lost my father and mum and I are doing much better now than we did the first year. Still hurts though.. but it's more bearable.





May it go better for you
I am truly sorry for your loss.





I do understand... i lost my wife 4 years ago now...





Find someone you can vent to, someone who will listen without judging, someone who will gently keep you involved in life.





Find someone who you can help... even if just by your listening to them.





try http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/Wid鈥?/a> or http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/Wid鈥?/a>





feel free to email me if you wish





peace..
ONLY time can heal the loss of a loved one.





getting angry at God does not solve it.


vengence sometimes works but it is an empty shell.





replacing new love with lost loves after a time is the only thing. love of work helps too, but love is still loss.
Think of the people who depend on you (children, parents, co-workers) they need you to keep functioning.





Right now you need to let yourself hurt, later it will be time to remember and go on.
Would he want you to just sit and cry all day and be depressed forever or would he want you to go on with your life and be productive. I would like to believe the latter to be true. Take care and God Bless
Your ally is time. And staying busy. Would he want you to suffer and mourn? He'd want you to heal and live and remember him with love. You'll see him again some day.
im so sorry....Ive lost many love relationships with marriage and without.....pray for strength....keep on going....whats your sign? Pisces women immediately start dating but for you maybe wait 6 mos or whatever then try....OOO good luck
Do not be afraid to love again.





All the living need love. And it is obvious that you are capable of great love.








...
pray that the person will recieve a place in heaven and do good for others! :)
im really sorry for your loss sadone


it must be a horrible thing to go through losing your other half


you truly do have my thoughts and my condolences





you have EVERY right to stay in bed if you want to


this is YOUR time to heal, to grieve, to do whatever you have to do to get through this and get to the other side of this





i hoenstly cant imagine what your going through, the nearest i have to this is my gran died and my grandad was left behind and he was lost without her


through seeing him, i can have a guess at what you may be going through


and its not easy





all you can do is talk about them, think about them, want to be with them, and you have every right to feell that way


dont let anyoen tell you otherwise





grief is NOT about moving on, its merely about coping and accepting


its about you with your future living the rest of your days without that person and you trying to ratioanlise, understand and finding a way to cope with it





(im not tryign to upset you here, im tryign to be hoenst, i hope im being tactful but i tend to just be honest as i beleive that is the best thing for psychology and life)





fact is, this is your life now, and its a horrible thing, and its a huge HUGE thing to have to get used to and live with





i lost my cat of 15 years and it affected me badly, so you must be going through a horrific time losing the love of your life,


and i do understand that is very horrible to expereicne and live with





i may not be able to imagine what its liek, but i do know its the hardest thign you will have to do


but


that is the point


that is what life is about





we all go through this , its all our destiny, to love and lose


and this is when the love is most impoprtant


it is what helps you heal and grieve


memories, sadness, joy, tears, laughter, anger, hate, ALL of it, everythign you feel, feel it, your entiteld to,in fact you HAVE to...


its the healing and grieving process





you dont have to put on a brave face for anuone, no one


this time is not about them


is about you, and your love


you , and your life


you and your loss


you and your grief





most of your family etc, wil only be tryign to help, but they will never be able to , because grief is not to be helped by words, or comforting visits or tea, its only goign to be helped by experiencing it, and dealign with it





most people dont know they wont be able to help, they put this guilt and burden on themselves to help the grieving, make them feel better


but you , and they, should try to accept, that is not going to happen





only time and healing can do that, no one person, no matter what they say, will not be able to cure, fix or take away your grief





if you feel you are getting too low, and not coping, i seriously suggest askign for help from a proffessional, doctor or soemone,





death is a very hard thign to go through, espeically when its soemone so close to you, and who you will miss every minuite of every day


so do not be afraid or ashamed to ask for help, be it medical or psychological, if you need it, please ask for it and take it





dont, DONT feel guilty for laughing, for living, for feeling


now


i know, that this is something you cant help but to do


so i say it knowing you will not take that advice, because you cant


but, its for you for the future, not for now





the stages of grief are what they are


you can do nothing but feel them


but


after that, when its just you , and not the stages anymore


then you will have the guilt, of living without them, and moving on with your life from the grief, from the death, from them





this does NOT mean you dont love them or never did


it ONLY means you are living, that is it


simply you are alive and so you are living


as you are SUPPOSED to


as they woudl want you to





please, dont expect too much of yourself at this time


of course losing him affects your day to day life, he WAS your life, your life is changed forever, and now you have to try to make a new life, that fits around you without him, that is the hardest thign you wil have to do





do what ever you have to to get through, but, dont deny any of your emotions or feelings


that is only damaging, you wil hurt yourself and neither you or him want that for you





if you need to talk, feel free to message me any time


i hope soemof my words may help you in soem small way, even jsut for a second


;-)