Wednesday, August 18, 2010

How do you stop letting a person affect your life?

I used to have a friend who bullied and manipulated me to the point where I had virtually no self esteem. Over time I have built myself up again and cut connections with her, however there are still times when I see this person or even hear about then where I feel anxious and worried, like I have lost my confidence again. This aggravates me as I know I should move on and not let her get to me, but however I make myself think I still feel attatched emotionally.How do you stop letting a person affect your life?
Why are you keeping a connection with this person. You are the only one in control of your emotions. What can this person really do to you. Hurt your feelings. Give yourself some credit. You have worked hard to get past your fear. How long ago did you cut connections with this person? How much longer are you willing to let this be apart of your life. Because it will go away when you truly let it go.How do you stop letting a person affect your life?
You have the power of your own destiny. It's not what happens in life it's how you respond to it. You have the power of your emotions so use it. Don't let them win and let it bother you. Who ever this is isn't even worth your thoughts. Focus on good and good will come. Turn situation around to being proud of having compassion for such a crude person. Stand in front of mirror and say I am worth all good things!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I used to have a very abusive relationship and it took me a long time to become confident and truly surrounding yourself with positive things create additional positive things. Good luck.
Don't allow or give that person power over you, even if it is just in your head. Remember, you are 100% in control of yourself %26amp; your life. Do not allow any negative internal talk get the best of you.


Do this. Just imagine that you are wearing a bright yellow rain slicker and all of that stuff that is negative hits that raincoat and just rolls off you. Nothing can penetrate that bright yellow slicker raincoat because you won't allow it. Right? Right!!! You are in 100% control of what affects your life.


Don't allow any insecurities affect the way things are because you are 100% in control of things. If you allow things to bother you, then you are giving up control. So just envision wearing a bright yellow slicker raincoat and any negative type of things just roll off that slicker. You are in charge of that yellow slicker and no one else. Even if you sometimes see a person, hear about that person, etc., just remember that invisible yellow slicker raincoat. NOTHING can penetrate it. Remember that those old Yellow Slicker Raincoats are made very thick and nothing can penetrate them. You are in 100% control, so don't allow others to affect your life in this manner. You are in total control.


Remember your mind is strong.
People deal with this differently..





Most people on here are saying 'just ignore them/block them out' but thats not always possible. Personally, i find that quite easy-I can just block someone out and act like I never knew them.





However, this isn't easy especially if you still live in the same area or have some friends in common. In this case, you need to try and get over it completely and don't just block emotions in. Over time, you will realise that you're a much better person without her and she doesn't have any power over you anymore. There is a reason why people in your past don't make it into your future. It might be helpful to you if you know if you're going to run into her-make sure you're not alone and with a friend who makes you feel good. When you do see her, make an effort to smile and think how far you've come since you knew her. Just think positively.
First of all : That was not a friend !!!


And now u have to start looking at yourself in the mirror, every day, and say to yourself that ur proud to be where u are and that nobody will get u down like that anymore


It may sound stupid but u need to build up some self esteem and u r the one that can do that :)


And u know what ? U already made the first step by cutting the connection with her and build yourself up , now u just have to move on further and u can do that !!!


Good luck
just fill your life with better people and be the best you can be and forget the other person. you know your better than that and just need some friends to support you. so find some good friends and be who you and shine.
For me it's very easy. Just try to forget about the person or the things that the person does. Think about other things and become closer to your best friend and talk to your friend abot it!
Give 'em the middle finger to the face and yell ';**** OFF';


If you feel like that doesn't help at all give that person an 'ol wan two light jab..
its hard--we just have2 block out that person just as fast as there name pops up--block them out--those feelings out--try not 2 let them know they affect u
ignore them
simple: don't let them





-they don't exist


-they aren't a person
To me it sounds like she had some big time problems with just her own self esteem. Your mentality should be, ';Be the bigger Person';. Sticks and stones. Maybe open up to her and let her know how the stuff she says makes you feel, but if shes the type of person to not have a mature converstaion, or make fun of you for even trying to do that, then basically shes just not a good person, let alone a good friend. It sounds like shes addicted to you, jealous of you, or something along the lines of that. She definitely has some issues where maybe, if you do care about her enough, you should seek her help. But comments and gestures cominig from her, that are intended to make you feel bad about yourself, should be blown off and as funny as it sounds, you need to realize that indirectly, they are compliments. I hope this helps you. You sound like you very kind hearted and subconsciously you are worried about this person, and want to help this person, or you know this person has a good heart and consciouse deep down inseid and you are trying to find the ';real'; her.





In most situations like this, the bully doesnt even know shes making you feel this way.





I hope this helps in someway, and dont let her bring you down!





-John R

No comments:

Post a Comment