What would you choose waiting for you bf who's in iraq or moving on with your life.?

I love my bf very much and right now he's in Iraq for 7 months. Honestly we've only been dating physically for 4 months and he just told me recently that he's thinking of extending an additional 7 more months for a total of 14 months. He told me he wants to VOLUNTEER to go to another place in the middle east to get a medal. He said no one in his shop has it so he wants it. Anyways I'm not sure if we're strong enough to make it through 14 months since we've only been physically together for 4. I want to wait for him but honestly I dont feel like he really though about my feelings in the situation. So i'm wondering if I should just move on with my life and get my life started with out him. I'm thinking about joining that Army and he is in the marines. I havent told him yet that i'm thinking of trying to join. If you were in my shoes what would you do? Just curious to see what others think. Oh and dont get me wrong I am very proud of him and I think it would be great for him to get the medal but I think he's just thinking about himself and isnt really thinking how much he just wants to be with me.What would you choose waiting for you bf who's in iraq or moving on with your life.?
waiting for him.


he's brave, you should stay with him.What would you choose waiting for you bf who's in iraq or moving on with your life.?
You don't say how old you are, but I take it that you are in your late teens, maybe 20.





You didn't date very long before your boyfriend went into the service, so it's not like you have years invested in the relationship. It is quite common for guys in the military to want to ';have someone'; at home. So rather than terminate the relationship, they fancy this romantic notion of someone ';waiting'; for them.





That's fine, except in your case, this guy isn't planning on coming home any time soon. He seems real into his military career, which is fine, and want to extend his tour for a number of reasons, all fine there, too. His world has gotten bigger and he's realizing that there are lots of opporunities out there.





It doesn't sound like there's a lot of reasons for you to sit around waiting for him to show up. It doesn't wounds like you two have a lot of life plans. So there's not a lot on the line. Once you move on and realize how much life there is waiting out there for you, you'll look back and know that you made the right decision.





As for you enlisting, that's fine, too. But do it for all the right reasons: YOU. And before you commit to the US Army, look into the USAF as well as the Navy. It is none of his business if you enlist, frankly. As stated before, it's not like you all have plans together. And you need to make something for yourself.





You can be proud of him. You can support him and be behind him 100%. But you don't need to put your life on hold and end up resentful as a result. Tell him that you respect and support him, and that you hope he will do the same for you. Keep it upbeat and don't explain it to death; there is no need.





He's on a mission and you have every right to get on with yours.





Good luck with your plans for enlistment. One of my daughters is in the USAF and delighted with her choices, her careers and the opportunities she's having. She is will suited to life in the military, which is important.





Keep the focus on you and everything else will fall right into place.
Support him in his decison but do tell him what you want from him...
You have been dating for 4 months... You need to move on and when he returns see if you two want to date again... Being over there will change him, to what degree will depend on him. When he returns you may not like what he has become or he may not like what you have become while he was gone sine I am assuming you are both very young.
I don't want to be the reason somebody breaks up since I'm some guy you never met, but...





Since you have to ask, isn't that your answer right there?
you just want some physical contact
don't wish yur life away waiting for him


just move on


trust me
I'd say move on. You're both going down different paths. Don't put your life on hold for him. You will be miserable if you don't live for yourself right now.
If you really care about him, wait for him, and tell him your intentions of joining the Army and tell him how you feel about him spending another 7 months somewhere else, otherwise move on with your life.
If you truly love him and he truly loves you, please wait. It will be worth it. If this man is your soul mate, you will absolutely regret it if you don't. It doesn't matter how long you've been dating, if its the real thing distance and time do not change that.





That being said, there are a lot of men who are NOT the right fit for anyone, and being a marine doesn't necessarily make someone a good man to be with. If you doubt him already, if he ever gave you reason not to trust him, if you're not completely sure that its worth it, perhaps you SHOULD move on. This is the question you have to ask yourself. Is he worth it? Because there are plenty of men (civilians too) who are.





Good luck sweetheart.
I think this really depends on your age, if you are 25 or under, just realize long distance relationships are almost impossible. Do you think you would regret it later in life if you broke up, like a ';the one that got away'; type situation? Whatever you decide be honest with him, I think it is terrible for someone to cheat while their partner is defending our country, so whatever the decision, treat the man with respect.
He is doing something really amazing.


However, you guys haven't been dating long enough to make such a large commitment. You definitely should talk to him about it, though. He may be able to shed light and make your decision easier.
Trust me on this.Staying in combat to earn a medal is foolish and selfish on his part.What kind of medal does he expect to earn?Suppose they send him to Afghanistan where the guys are really having a rough time.I did three tours in Nam,but not to earn medals.I had no choice in the first two tours,but by my rotation date from the second tour,I didn't want to leave because I kind of went dinky.It cost me my health and almost cost me my family.I would say by by to the guy because his ego means more to him than you do.Move on with your life.You deserve better.I was 30 years old when I finished my last tour,so I was not a young kid looking for glory.I was already highly decorated.I am disabled today because of Nam.I also have PTSD.
That is a choice only you can make. That being said, whatever you decide you need to let him know soon, so he doesn't feel as though you are just leading him on. It's hard for those at home that have loved ones away, but if you had only been dating for four months and he will be gone for 14 I don't really see the relationship lasting. But ask yourself this question....If he were called up for a second tour instead of volunteering, would you feel the same way?
I think you should wait for him... Hes doing a good thing and it ill be worth it at the end... But do what your heart tells you =) Peace on Earth =) Love is on its way... %26lt;3
I think you should wait. In the end it will truly pay off, and the best part would be when you two finally see each other again when he comes home.


:)
I think it's very nice that you've waited this long for him, but the answer is NO, BREAK UP WITH HIM, AND NEVER HOLD YOURSELF BACK FOR SOMEONE ELSE. Especially since you had only actually physically had been with him for 4 months. That's not enough time to really fall in love with someone.





You really need to move on with your life. If he considered you in his decision to extend his service, then it's pretty obvious that he picked the military over you. Don't waste your time waiting for someone who puts his work first.
as they say move on in life
I know you've been with him for 4 months and that is long term, but it's not long enough to wait more that 3 TIMES that amount for him to come home. He's volunteering to stay over there meaning that he wants to and he didn't even discuss it with you. That's saying that he doesn't include you in big decisions.





Please don't waste you're life away waiting for him to finish living out his dream. I know you care about him, but you should care about yourself more. I think that you should go out and date and if when he gets back, if you are single and he wants to be with you, then go for it.





But don't hold off on being happy.





Honestly if he was serious about you he wouldn't volunteer to stay away. There's too many guys who will love you and be with you now. And like you said, you don't know if he will want to be with you when he gets back.





Good luck!
i can understand where your alittle confused here, you think because of the time you've been together your not really sure if your relationship is strong enough to last through over a year of him being gone, thats going to be really rough on you. My boyfriend lived in illinois for the first 8 months of our relationship and i lived in New York. It was very hard because we had no face to face affection that we could give and its things like that that make your relationship special. We are very in love and we knew that we were able to do it, on the other hand we were together for alittle longer than you guys at this point but we still waited the 8 months til he was capible of moving to new york with me. Its alittle different because he was able to call me alot through the day but even with that its still very difficult, If you feel that you can have something special with him, Ill tell you this much.....dont throw that away because theres more scums out thre then nice guys, The 8 months without him was extremly hard but we've been together over a year now and it really all paid off in the end and just made us that much stronger. It takes your relationship to new levels and you can see just how serious you are about eachother. Give it a few months and if you dont see it getting anywhere then ill tell you to continue living your life because you shouldnt have to go through the pain unless its someone you plan on being with, 14 months is a very long time keep that in mind, but if you feel hes worth it, GO for it because not many good guys come around!