Monday, August 16, 2010

How did you get over the worst breakup of your life so far?

How did you deal with it and what sort of things did you do to forget about the whole ordeal? What helped you to move on with your life?


=)How did you get over the worst breakup of your life so far?
There are some break ups that you never get over. My situation doesn't really qualify as a ';break up'; ... more of a ';It Broke Me'; kind of thing.





17 years ago my fiance went to Texas to attend her family reunion. I couldn't get the time off from work to go with her but I did get a day off so I could take her to the airport in Buffalo and see her and her 7 year old son off. For about a week before this I could tell that there was something bothering her. I figured she would tell me when she was ready. When they were getting ready to get on the plane she stopped turned to look me straight in the eye and asked me if I loved her. I'll never forget the intensity in her eyes when she said that ... it was almost frightening. I looked right back at her with the same intense look and told her that if I really needed to answer that question then she was going to miss her flight because we needed to have a serious talk ... I took her left hand and brought it up between us and pointed to the engagement ring that I had put on her finger a month before that and said don't you remember this. The smile that exploded on her face is another thing that I'll never forget. She said I love you too and threw herself into my arms. That hug seemed to last forever and as she pulled away from me she kissed me on the cheek and said I'll see you in a week ... daddy. It took a few moments for what she said to sink in but when it did ... I looked at her and said are you ... six weeks she said. I think that was the single most happy moment in my entire life. We hugged again and I kissed her good bye and watched her get on the plane. It was the last time I ever saw her. While she was in Texas she and her sister and her little boy Kevin were killed in a huge car crash. I hadn't even told anyone that she was pregnant ... I wanted to wait until after she had got back so we could tell everybody together. It was years before I could tell anyone and I spent the better part of those years trying to curl up inside a Vodka bottle and die. I wouldn't recommend my ';way'; of dealing with the grief to anyone ... bad idea. I carried that pain around with me all bottled up inside for years. Then I met someone else. It was one of the classic friends, become great friends, become lovers kind of stories. We lived together for just over a year. At first it was just room mates and friends. We both were carrying a ton of pain around with us and as we became closer we ended up helping each other face the pain, accept it, deal with it, and move on. When it turned to love it seemed so perfect. In the end the fact that I was 11 years older than her doomed our relationship. When summer rolled around and she starting to hang out with her friends more they picked on her about me ... asking her when she had to go to the nursing home to see her boyfriend and things like that. The saddest part of the whole thing was that they were only kidding, I've run into many of them in the years since it happened and every one of them says they couldn't believe that she took it to heart ... a couple of them even told me that they were only picking on her because they were kind of jealous of what a great thing we had going. It got real messy real quick and then it was over. I still don't understand what happened but truth I probably don't want to know. Even with all that I will always be thankful to her for helping me accept what had happened to Bonnie, acknowledge the hurt and the pain and then move on. I haven't seen her in over five years but, being the hopeless romantic I am, I still send her two dozen roses every year on March 29th. One dozen is to say happy birthday. The other dozen is to remember the anniversary of the first time we made love ... the night of her 21st birthday. I'll never forget that night either.





Oh well ... life goes on I guess ...How did you get over the worst breakup of your life so far?
Actually music worked best for me. The faster, the heavier, the louder, the angrier, the better for me. Right now, a band called, ';5 Finger Death Punch'; has a song out called, ';The Bleeding'; that just might do the trick. Also, Megadeth's ';In My Darkest Hour'; is a great one too. Good luck. Another tip; do not say her name anymore. Refer to her as ';what's her face, what's her beak or what's her ****';. I hope this helps.
I had a terrible, abusive relationship that messed up my head for years afterwards. I actually ended up dropping all of my friends (they were also his friends) and starting again. I got through it though. Now I'm married to an angel and have a beautiful baby boy. I think I got the better end of the deal....


:)
Wow.... Lets see, ummmm I have yet to FULLY get over it. I am just moving on slowly with my life, just as is. Staying busy and when I am feeling those sad remorse full feelings over the breakup I feel them and with that I let some of them go. I don't think I will ever ';get over'; him, I will always have love for him, it has just stopped growing.
I got my ';revenge'; by watching him ruin his life with the skank he cheated on me with. She had 3 kids when they married and had another right after...turned out not to be his-LOL. Then, he became a grandfather at age 34 when her hoe of an older daughter, who was all of 13, got knocked up by a guy old enough to be her father! Believe it or not, they're still married, on welfare, and the skank he married gained about 150 pounds and a prescription painkiller addiction. At age 41, he looks like he's 81...and I couldn't be happier!!! Knowing his life sucks helped me greatly.
Time heals all wounds, it really does. It wasn't easy, and it took at least a couple of months, but with lots of crying, and leaning on my friends and their support and good advice, and help from a therapist (good timing, that, since I started going right before the breakup), I got past it, and now, I'm happier than I ever was before.
what yOuh can dO is just be wiith yOuhr friiends .


dey `ll make it sOO much better .


have a girl `s niight Out .


dhat 's what i diid .


iit `ll be really hard tO just get Over iit dhatt fastt .


sO yOuh juss gOtta be wiith yOuhr best friiends .


dey `ll make yOuh feel better .


-*%26amp; try to mOve On . !!


dOn ' t wOrry . everythiinq wiil be alritee ;*'
I think its like mourning. You go through stages. You can't beleive it happened and are in denile, you freak out and feel like your world is ending, then you move on. Take it one day at a time and have self respect.
it was my mess , i lost my angel nyways i din forget her yet and dont even wnt to , it's upto u whether u wnt sum1 elz better or juz keep on luvin one ur heart think dat there is no1 better than that,


and if u really love someone u can't forget them on ny price blow me if u find me rong.
I'm still trying to get over him. It'll be 6 months since we've broken up on the 30th. I miss him more than anything. But this summer %26amp; this upcoming school year I'll be busy w/ Colorguard and stuff, I'll be a freshman this year and he still be in middle school, so I guess that'll help.
I stayed single and focused on myself.I started to paint,exercise and spent time with friends and family.It took me three years to be able to date after my divorce.It is a good time to soul search.I also suggest not to have sex either.
I got dumped one day, fired the next. Bad week.





I laid in bed for about a week, didn't eat, lost about 15 pounds and then drug my butt out of bed and started over. I went back to college.
Time. You're not going to stop thinking about the person for a long while, but you've got to keep yourself busy. Find things to occupy your time.


Time heals all wounds.
It's been hard but I've been hanging out with my family and working and that's how i got over it. I've just done other things to keep my mind off of it.
You can't forget the whole ordeal, but you can learn from it.





You need time to get past the pain and loss.





((hugs))
The best way to deal with a breakup is to move on and find someone new. It worked for me.
I can't say I've ever suffered unduly because of a breakup - I tend to look at it as an opportunuity.
I was lucky that when we broke up, my bestfriend took me out to dinner and we started dated and then we ended up falling in love. :)
Currently experiencing the worst breakup of my life...Ill get back to ya....
another guy asked me out, I said yes, and hes the sweetest person ive ever met
just move on

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